here i go...

Once upon a time there lived a dragon, uh wait! no a princess, yeah a princess. She had really long hair uhhhh.... and she was really pretty her name was Una.

"oh shut up", said Una Banvard as she crushed the soon-to-be novel with her fists.

"what?",I asked,"what did I do wrong?"

"you called me a dragon dumb-ass, it's not as if i can't read!", now she was really mad there seemed fire coming out of her nose.

"well, you CAN breath fire, and as far as I know so can dragons", I smartly replied.

"now you've done it", laughed Patricia Parker.

Patricia always laughed,but always kept her distance when Una was involved.

I was as good as dead.